Thursday, October 2, 2014

it truly is a process

Have you ever tried to move your life and fit everything into 6 boxes and two suitcases?
 I started with three, then went to five and ending it with six...

I have red trough my fifty plus journals and let them go, I have gone trough boxes of picture's from age 0-present and laughed, cried and reminiscing.
 I have let it all go and it was scarrie and sad but even more so freeing and liberating!!
Even though I am not one to collect things due to lack of storage, I am chocked how much stuff we think we need. We all do that, maybe one day I will need this so I should to keep it.
Two words I will try to get better not to use, should  and need…. WE don't NEED anything!!! We might want it, but we don't need it.

 I have been pretty  good with handing over clothes to my girl Heather or to Goodwill trough the years but yet last night I filled six trash bags filled with clothes I haven't worn in forever. SIX!!!!
But oh maybe I will wear them one day….. NO, I won't. Someone else will appreciate them more, and maybe they actually  even do NEED them.

My motto is: If I forgot about them, they got to go.

 I allow six boxes max, so I better listen to my heart when I pack.
 I was going to sublet my house just incase of regret, but yesterday I gave my notice. I am letting it go after 15 years living in my beautiful little house.
I have a chance to start all over with everything and I want to do it right.
I want to simplify my life as much as I can and I see how long I can go with very little stuff. And for those of you who knows me, I love nice stuff…..

Just as clothes loose the quality after a few washes and picture's fade in color so does the core of our being, our body, even our cells. We get tired. We need to reset.
We all have had moments when go into autopilot mood, everything needs to happen fast, buy food from the deli at Whole foods, texting instead of calling etc... We slowly loose our creative thinking and then we get fatigue, uninspired, anxious and sometimes even depressed.

I realized after buying 9 dollar bottle pressed juicery instead of making it myself,  I have fallen into auto pilot mode and it's taking me away from my truth. I think having a toddler it might be easy to get there. Right mom's?

SO, I knew I needed to shift direction, stir things up, to reset.
 What is TRULY important I asked, What do I really, really REALLY want? If I look back on my life what will be my regret? And I got the answer. And it was very simple.
 So I decided to be brave and bold and start over. I knew I don't want to look back and remember I was to scared or to attached to shift what is not working.

I have this amazing chance to start fresh and I will not do it half fast, I will do it truly listening to my heart saying, YES you are doing the right thing,  rather then my ego whispering don't do it because change is to difficult.

I'ts beautiful to see most of my furniture going to friends, I love when they pick it up. But I have also had great interaction with strangers who have been buying stuff. One girl texted me a picture of my mirrored glass dresser I wanted SO BADLY to bring with me, even got a quote on shipping fees, but when she texted me the picture and told me how beautifully it fit her bedroom It meant more to me then to cling on to it just because I think I need it.

It's all a process, and that is the greatest lesson in all this. We can't expect to be ok with everything right away, it takes time. We have to allow ourselves to feel whatever we are feeling. But if we are present with it all, reminding ourselves how short and precious life is, we have this one chance, it actually might happen sooner then we think. Love C

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